Why It's Important to Be Authentically You
A friend of mine once said to me, “Don’t worry, Tish. You’re someone’s cup of tea.”
We were talking about my endeavor of scaling my life coaching practice. I was in my head, worrying about whether or not there was space for me in this industry and if anyone would actually want to work with me or learn from me.
We’ve all been there: in our heads wondering if we are enough and if people are going to rock with the real us.
I’m reminded of one of the final scenes in Selena where Selena is talking to her mom:
Selena: I've been thinking about the crossover tour a lot. I've even had dreams about it. It's just this whole different world for us, you know? We've been working for this ever since we were kids. I guess I'm a little scared...
Are they gonna love me, Mama?
Selena’s Mom: Yes, Mija, they're gonna love you.
Real talk, it’s scary as ish when you start showing up in the world as your authentic self. It takes a lot of courage to say, “Hey, this is who I am and this is what I’m offering to the world. Take it or leave it.” The reality is that there is a possibility that some people would rather leave it.
Today I’m going to share with you three things that I want you to keep in mind when you’re thinking about being your authentic self:
1. Your vibe attracts your tribe.
This is more than just a phrase on a cute t-shirt you see at Target. When you are true to yourself and you put yourself out there, you emit a frequency, a vibe, out into the universe. Those who are on the same frequency can pick up that vibe and make their way to you.
I am so grateful for my close friends because they add so much love and laughter to my life. I know that if I had not been myself I would not have vibed with them.
If you’re currently not happy with the people who are surrounding you, don’t blame them. Get curious about what vibe you’re putting out in the universe.
“Dime con quién andas y te diré quién eres” is a saying in Spanish that translates to “Tell me who you’re hanging out with and I’ll tell you who are you.” Your friends are a reflection of you and you are reflection of your friends.
This also goes for all of you entrepreneurs and business professionals. When you are your most authentic self, you are able to attract customers, clients and opportunities that actually excite you and mirror what you (and your business) really stand for.
It all begins with your courage to show up as the highest version of your most authentic self.
2. You repel that which is not meant for you.
Whether it’s clients, friends, job opportunities, or romantic partners, when you stand in your power and show up as yourself, you repel that which is not meant for you.
I know it’s hard to believe, but not everyone is rocking with ya girl. Gasp. Say whaaaa. LaTisha, how is this possible? Girl, I don’t know, but it’s true.
Not everyone is rocking with me and I’m a-okay with it. You see, there are over 7 billion people in the world and I don’t have the bandwidth to deal with all of them. Hell, I don’t have the bandwidth to deal with even half of them.
The beauty of life is that we are all unique and love different things.
What moves me to tears may not even cause you to blink twice and vice-versa. If you love olives, you and I will never have a fight over who gets the last olive. If you hate pickles, you and I will never have a fight over who gets the last one … and that’s just food we’re talking about.
When I graduated from business school, I knew I wanted to work in Finance. I was bummed out because I didn’t get many interviews. One look at my resume can give you a clue why. If it’s between me and someone who has been working in Finance for four years, guess who is probably more qualified and will ramp easier if given the position.
I get it.
I made peace with this because I realized that I didn’t need 20 job offers. I just needed one solid offer from a company that would teach me, value me, and pay me. I didn’t need to get an offer from a Financial Services Firm in Madison, Wisconsin because I didn’t want to live there (nothing against Madison, WI at all). I didn’t need to get an offer from Credit Suisse because I had no interest in being an Investment Banker. (They certainly don’t want me, either, so it’s no love lost.)
I view not getting the opportunity or not making the friend as God’s protection. You never know what you’re being saved from when someone rejects you. That dude that you want to get with so badly that you changed your hair color because you heard he likes blondes pales in comparison to your real soulmate (who loves you no matter color your hair is). You’ll seriously delay or miss out on a chance to meet your soulmate if you’re too busy trying to change who you are for some dude that will never truly rock with you.
3. Courage and peace of mind love authenticity.
People pleasing, faking the funk, and being something you’re not expends a lot of energy and leaves you exhausted and frazzled. We often do it because we think it’s our key to survival and how we will get ahead. However, when you’re doing whatever everyone else is doing, you miss out on the blessings that God has just for you, including the peace that surpasses all understanding.
Furthermore, authenticity and courage go hand in hand because when you show up as you are, you know what your deal breakers and boundaries are. No more taking shit because you’re not trying to rock the boat. Authenticity says, “I don’t need to rock the boat because I’m on my own yacht.”
HB, show us who you are. The you inside. The one that you want to hide but you catch glimpses of it every now and then. I assure you she is way more interesting than the people pleasing, playing small, frazzled energy you may be giving off now.
Now it’s your turn. Comment below and tell me how you’ve been masking your true self lately.
I’m cheering for you. Like you’re looking up at the moon and you’re dreaming.
From the Front Row,