LaTisha’s Answer: Nope. Not at all.
Believe it or not, I am a huge worrier and I hate it. Worry is a sign that fear and self-doubt have highjacked my brain. While I honor my fear and its desire to keep me safe, I really should be focusing on my track record of blessings and how God has always shown up and shown out for me, over and over again. I look over at Lyric, who is going to town in her jumper, and I remember how she was a prayer I prayed for over 4 years. She’s here now.
I know this.
However, I waste precious brain power contemplating the worst case scenario over and over and over again. I focus on my defeat and imminent doom, instead of getting to work. By the time I switch over to thinking about what I do want to happen and get to work creating it, I am drained and I just want to feel sorry for myself and do nothing.
It’s really hard to be creative and productive when I am mentally bashing myself. I admit that I spend more time planning and wallowing in overwhelm than I do taking action.
Lately, I’ve been doing my own version of The Five Second Rule where I Nike -- just do it. If a thought pops into my head, I act on it as soon as I can. Just ask LaMecia. My dear friend recently received an e-mail from me because I kept getting the thought, “E-mail LaMecia” kept popping into my head.
So far, so good. I’m getting outside my comfort zone, which is scary AF. However, I am choosing to actively participate relentlessly in the manifestation of my own blessings, like Liz Gilbert says.
What are my dreams?
Well, one major dream I have is to one day sell out Madison Square Garden. (Pause -- Voice inside me that says that’s unrealistic, kindly hush. Proceed.)
Lately, I close my eyes and visualize what this feels like. I put myself there mentally. I imagine 20,789 seats filled with people who are anxious to hear me speak. I am onstage. I look up and am blinded by the spotlight. I hear my voice booming out of the speakers and directly insert itself into hearts and minds. I see dormant seeds immediately begin to bloom. I can feel the awe of it and it’s not even happened yet. I can feel the Beyoncé fans hit my skin and blow my hair all about. Oh, yes, there are Beyoncé fans because ya girl sweats easily. You put me in a spotlight and my face is going to melt off.
Lately, it feels so real to me that, when I open my eyes, I am surprised to be sitting on the floor in my room.
While I want this with all my heart, I know that the current version of me is not ready for that.
I know that my dreams are three sizes too big for me and they are begging me to grow, to believe, to keep going. I am evolving into that woman who is standing there center stage. I know she's inside of me, blooming daily. I can't wait to meet her.
My area of opportunity is to put all of my time and brain power into the relentless pursuit of this dream instead of wallowing in fear and self-doubt.
Again, I look over at Lyric as I write this and I am blown away by the brilliance of her smile. She lives in a world of possibility and I want to join her.
Now it’s your turn. What are you dreaming of? How are you preparing for it? Hit reply or head on over to my post and comment there.
I am cheering for you. Like you’re an 8 month old in a jumper.
From the Front Row,